Deborah, a professional organizer, found that order at home made the chaos of life much more manageable. Now she teaches her secrets to other parents.
Deborah's Story
"I was at a crossroads in my life. I needed to reinvent myself."
I was a freelance fashion designer, and that phase was coming to an end. I asked myself, "What can I do on a freelance basis and still be a full-time mom for my two boys?" My first priority was being there for them and being a role model.
Someone suggested that since I had always been an organized person, I should be a professional organizer. I didn't even know that existed, or that you could make money doing it. I found NAPO, which is the National Association for Professional Organizers, and I went to a meeting and met so many people who thought the same way I do.
"I immediately got involved."
Before I started a business of my own, I volunteered and worked for other organizers. It was an incredible learning curve, because organizing for yourself is one thing, but making it a profession and organizing for others is something else.
"Believe it or not, being organized takes out of the box thinking."
When I first talk on the phone with clients, I tell them not to clean up, because that's not going to help me. I have to see what my client has created, in its natural state. At that point, I am able to zero in on what's bugging them the most. For most people, it's the piles of mail or their kids' toys.
Then I just plunge right into it. I don't do an assessment, because we can talk about our plan during the first session. The plan always involves the six steps of organizing:
1. Sort your items.
2. Purge, or get rid of what you don't need.
3. Assess the situation. Ask yourself questions like, "What is this room going to be used for? Who's using it? What's my organizing style?"
4. Contain your items in the places you've created for them.
5. Label containers and areas where things are supposed to go.
6. Maintain the organizing system you're working with.
"No one is born with an organizing gene."
To be successful, you have to get into a habit. Organizing is a learned habit. Everybody can learn it, but you have to be dedicated. You have to create a system that works with your personality. If the system works for you, it's because it's working with you. It's not forcing you to do something that you wouldn't naturally do.
A good example is pilers vs. filers. If a right-brained person loves to pile their paper, you can't force them to have a filing system. For a person like this, we figure out a more open piling system that they'd be able to stick to.
"My motto is real-life habits, not perfection. It especially makes sense when you have kids."
I have two boys, ages 9 and 11, and they aren't necessarily neat. The house can be a total mess, with train tracks and Legos everywhere. But for me, it's okay. I know that they can put the trains away when it's time.
When working with clients who have kids, I want to work with their children and include them in the decision making - what to get rid of, where should something live. You want them to own and understand the process. You want them to feel like they're part of it even if they're just helping you sort. And believe me, they're big helpers with sorting, because they know their toys very well.
There are a lot of skills involved in organizing, so as parents, we need to be role models and help them build these skills.
"When you get organized and you have a routine, you are free."
Once the environment is set up and everything has a home, the next step is creating routines - a morning routine, an afternoon routine, a homework routine. If everything is settled and has a place, your life is no longer about your stuff or your lack of time. Your life has purpose, and it becomes about doing the things you want to do.
