Fara thought that having an older son would make potty training easier for her little boy. But she quickly learned that it's not always easier the second time around.
Fara's Story
"I'd heard before that it was easier to potty train your second child. But I honestly didn't have that experience."
I have two sons, ages seven and three. When I was potty training my older son, he was very cooperative. With my younger son, I thought potty training would be even easier because he copies everything his older brother does. He plays the games his brother likes, he wants do to karate like his brother, everything. But he hasn't been working with us like I thought he would. We know he has to go, and he knows he has to go, but he's so playful and energetic that it's been a challenge to get him to stop playing and go to the restroom. We've learned a lot this time around.
Rely on family and friends for help and ideas.
Because we are very close with my mom, she's provided a lot of help with the kids, especially when I work full-time. When she's watching my younger son, she makes the effort to take him every half hour or hour, to make sure that he goes. It's been very special and helpful to have her.
It's also useful when you talk to other moms who can share tips about what worked for them. Somebody might have a different idea than you do and if yours gets old, you might try something new.
Invent games that make going to the bathroom fun.
Something we try is playing games with him. This is funny, but we tell him, "Put the fire out in the toilet. You're the fire engine." We also put little flushable things, like leaves or flushable toys you can buy at the toy store, in the toilet. He tries to point at them and that makes it a little more interesting for him to go.
Reward your child when they're successful.
When he first started using the potty to pee, we would buy him little gifts. We would take him to Toys R Us and he would pick out something small. But when he went Number 2, that was a big, big deal, so we would either take him to Chuck E. Cheese or get a bigger gift, so that he would feel like this was a big achievement for him. We made sure he knew why he was getting this gift - because he went to the potty - and we would tell him that he was growing up, and if he kept doing well, he could do more of the things his brother does, like taking different classes.
At first I hesitated to use the reward system because I don't want to bribe him to do stuff like this, but on the other hand, I feel like it encourages him. I don't look at it as bribery, it's more like telling him, you did something very important and you're being appreciated for it.
"It's still a work-in-progress, but I'm hoping it'll be done soon."
I am hoping that within a maximum of three or four months, he'll be potty trained. Compared to my other son, the little one is already behind, even though I know it's not based on age. I know through my research that it doesn't have to happen immediately for some kids. Since he understands so much and he communicates with us so much and does almost everything else by himself, I know that he just needs more pushing and encouragement. I know we're almost there.