The subject of stress has been much on my mind for the last several months. In late July of 2006, runoff from torrential monsoon rains in southeastern Arizona roared down the Rincon mountains and became a 14-foot-high wall of water that smashed through my home.

It ripped open or waterlogged a half-dozen buildings on the property beyond repair, and wiped out a lifetime's worth of accumulated paperwork and possessions.

But life is not what happens; it is what we focus upon. No one was killed or even injured, and the process of recovery, though tedious, is not without its grace notes. As it turns out, nothing truly irreplaceable was lost, and very little of what was destroyed has proved to be essential to my peace of mind.

My lifelong habit of meditating has helped me through, but more than that, this disaster has shown me - as if I needed reminding - the value of friendship. My on-site staff - executive assistants, gardener, grounds manager, household manager and medical partner - did what the best people always do: rolled up their sleeves (and pant legs!) and tirelessly, skillfully and cheerfully worked to put things right.

I was out of town when the flood hit, but I am told that, at one point, they waded across a raging streambed in ice-cold, knee-high water, arms loaded with computers to get the disk drives to higher ground. Such wonderful friends are worth infinitely more than anything the flood took away, and my gratitude soothes my stress like a healing balm.

If you are in the midst of a crisis, shift your focus from what has gone wrong to what's gone right, and especially, to anyone who has stood by you through the dark times. With that attitude, the light will break through much sooner.

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