16. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 8:54 am PST

I like the thrill of the first time... after that... forget it!! So it was fun... now I gotta go!! LOL

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17. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 9:03 am PST

oh well dumped again-whoa is me

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18. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 3:53 pm PST

Nothing selfish about what Dr. Laura said here. She just said you should never make your children your WHOLE life!! Not only is it healthy for your marriage, but it will create a healthy environment for a child to grow up and become a well-rounded, mentally healthy, capable person... One who doesn't feel "entitled" and doesn't have major "insecurities" as can happen when a child grows up in an environment that is absolutely and completely "all about him".

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19. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 3:57 pm PST

If a child doesn't see that his parents "love themselves" how will he learn to love him or herself??

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20. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 5:27 pm PST

With all due respect, to everyone who has posted on this topic so far. Infancy and childhood are short. The impact of the quality of care or neglect last a lifetime. For a spouse who expects they need more attention then a young child, they should NEVER have children! For at least the first five years, your child should feel like THEY ARE THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE. If you can't give them that, DON"T HAVE CHILDREN. If you expect your marriage and sex life to feel like the ten minutes you were in love, GET OVER IT! { Or get a new spouse every two years!}

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21. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 5:33 pm PST

With that said, all members of a family need to be loved , admired, nurtured, and affirmed. Including mother and father. For children to grow into self-reliance, that has to be role-modeled by parents. Parents,especially mothers need to maintain their self identy, aside from their roles as mother and wife.

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22. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 5:35 pm PST

#21 I meant to say THE FIRST TEN MINUTES YOU WERE IN LOVE.

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23. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 5:38 pm PST

If I say NO to the idea of being a "perfect" parent, does that mean now I have to be the PERFECT LOVER? That's a hugh thing to maintain over a life time. At least the kids grow up!

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24. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 6:52 pm PST

My only living child, who just turned 21, was and always will be the center of my universe. After my daughter died and they told me at 19 years old that I could not have any children, my son was born 10 years later. I knew he would always be the number one thing in my life. Thankfully, his fiance understands that and is fine with it as long as once they are married I don't do those annoying unannounced drop ins - which I have assured her that I won't if they don't, LOL. BTW, he is a bright, employed, college student, engaged to a lovely girl who is the same and despite being spoiled like there was no tomorrow he seems to have turned out fine. However, I do understand that there are over-achieving parents out there who have their children so stressed out that they are on anti-anxiety medication before they are out of Primary School and that is ridiculous. As I say to all things - MODERATION - as spoiled as my son is - he knows that WORD very well !!

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25. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 7:33 pm PST

#20-good! made me say, OUCH!lol

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26. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 7:48 pm PST

25 rustormi- anti-anxiety medication befor they are out of Primary School!!LOL...that was good...coco

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27. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 8:57 pm PST

WOM I just thought it was a given that everyone knew they shouldn't NEGLECT their kids...!!!! LOL! And I'm sure the author and we posters were't talking about infants. But parents (and especially mothers) have to love themselves and take care of themselves before they can take care of a child effectively. If a mother gives and expects to get all of her love to and from her child... she puts a lot of stress on the poor little one. They can feel this intrinsicly and it can cause much anxiety in their later years. We are capable of loving many people in our lives and a mother is capable of loving herself, her children and her husband, equally... (there are many women up country who have had over 15 kids!!! They have enough love for all of them.. and even some left over!! LOL) I know a man who is one of 22 children!! WOW!! That's a lot of love!!

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28. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 9:00 pm PST

I know, I know... I'm not a mother so I shouldn't be posting here!!!! LOL! Sorry!

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29. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 9:02 pm PST

What freeking planet are you on doc? If you choose to have children, then you have to do everything in your power to raise them to be wonderful. My ex-husband and I split for reasons other than the kids and us, but we have been able to raise them children to have all three graduate Valedictorians in their respective classes. I'm very proud. My ex and I don't even speak...but we both felt the children we decided to bring into this world were more important than us. We have raise an International multiligual (Spanish, French, Portuguese, Arabic) Business major, a Physicist/Architect/Engineer, and an Accountant/It/Banker...would never have changed a thing even though my ex and I don't talk...we both did a great job raising our children. As much as a love life means to me, my children are the heart and soul of me...sorry, that's just the way it is.

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30. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 24, 2007, 9:07 pm PST

No, no, no....If you choose to bring children into this world, you better be d*mn well ready to take care of them and raise them properly..........selfishness is why there are so many kids with NO DIRECTION and why the crime level is so high. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO TAKE CARE OF KIDS...DON'T HAVE ANY. SEX is not as important as taking care of what the sex you had in the first place produced...deal with it appropriately. Laura, this is not a funny or good subject, in fact, it's IGNORANT!

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