Did you know that 85% of women who suspect their mate is cheating are right? That gut feeling is strong among women -- far stronger than among men, who are right about a cheating partner only about half the time.

However, gut feelings don't justify that most forbidden of couples behavior: spying.

Couples who spy on each other rarely stay together. In fact, if you find yourself spying on your partner, you already have the answer you seek...your relationship is in trouble.

Spying has become especially prevalent in our digital times. Cell phones track all of a partner's calls and text messages (and who hasn't peeked, every now and then?). Email, IM and, how could we forget, blogs, offer another world for many of us to play out our deepest desires and other hidden parts of personalities. Which leads us back to that most nagging of questions: Is cyber-flirting cheating? But alas, that's another topic for another time...

Ultimately, if you're snooping around your partner's email or plotting to get some alone time his or her cell phone, the spoils of your snooping are beside the point. The only "evidence" you need is to trust what you are feeling and directly confront the issue. It's time for couples therapy, a long sit-down conversation or what your gut has been telling you this whole time -- to break-up.

Spying is a sign that your intimacy has deteriorated or was never what it should have been in the first place. Either the person you're spying on is guilty, or your ability to trust is deeply wounded, often the result of prior betrayal or deeper fears of abandonment and insecurity from childhood.

So if you find yourself spying, make the decision to communicate...or proceed at your own risk.