This week's the time when every pundit, blogger and jilted lover feels they need to weigh in about romance, love, and the health benefits of chocolate. But we all know the real deal. Valentine's Day may be the Broadway show of romance, but if you want your relationship to really thrive, you better have some pretty amazing rehearsals the other 364 days of the year. Starting today--in the days after the most commercially romantic day of the year--why not take a few easy steps to really sweeten your relationship? The best reason of all: Because your gesture comes at the exact moment when your beloved least expects it--and will most appreciate it. Here are some his and her tips to make he and she happier every day.
THE SENTIMENTAL GESTURE
- For her: Now that the flower shops have experienced their annual version of Black Friday, you'd think that these would be the last places to shop. But now's the exact time to pounce--in the form of the droopy marked-down roses that will be on extreme sale. She won't think you're a half-price cheapskate if you rip their heads off and toss the petals in a bath that you'll draw for her when she comes home from work. What makes it work is that the symbolism of doing it the day after V-Day is loud and clear and ranks a 9 on her "aw" meter: You love her every day.
- For him: Most guys aren't sentimental in the typical way. They don't need poetry written to them or songs serenaded at them. But they are sentimental in their own way. One hot button: Something a guy can hang proudly in his office--maybe a favorite movie poster framed, a goofy shot of the kids, some sports memorabilia he can use as a conversation-starter in his office, or the digital evidence he has of the 60-pound tuna he caught last summer. Meaningful doesn't have to be mushy--and with a lot of guys, it's often better if it isn't.
THE COMMERICAL GESTURE
- For her: Guys have a hard time buying for women. They don't know sizes. They don't know tastes. And, to be honest, they're not even sure if she owns the very same shirt/ring/book that he's thinking about buying. The better move for any gift: Do some homework and call her friends, her sister, or her mom to find out what she wants. People like to say that the thought counts; selecting the right gift counts more. Double bonus: the friends/sister/mom will definitely call to inform your squeeze about how eager you were to buy just the right thing, which means you get twice as much credit.
- For him: Men don't like shopping if it means picking between 33 different linen patterns, but when they can shop for some toys, yeah, that's a very good thing. Take the amount of money you're going to spend on him, divide it by four and buy gift cards for his favorite stores (sports, hardware, iTunes, whatever). Then hide them in a box that holds playing cards. Men dig the practical and the fact that you know what he likes--that's his idea of romance.
THE PAMPERING GESTURE
- For her: Spa gift certificates are nice. Or manicures, pedicures ... pick your spa service. But survey after survey shows that women really want men to be more romantic by being more pragmatic. She wants him to clean, do dishes, iron, vacuum, feed the kids--anything. Men tend to think that foreplay is kissing, touching, and lighting scented candles. She thinks it's more effective for men to engage in chore-play.
- For him: Of course, maybe the guy's not into exfoliating scrubs, but considering the fact that he shaves every day, he has some serious face time, too. Cool gift to appeal to his softer side: A barber-style, hot-lather machine. It's his 3-minute daily spa experience that he'll appreciate every day.
THE SEXY GESTURE
- For her: Women say they hate men who treat sex like a math formula-X plus Y equals "Oh yeah." Instead, men need to take a more artistic approach--varying rhythm, pacing, location, moisture, pressure points and all of the other factors that make infinitely different bedroom experiences. It means kissing the length of her spine, or across her collarbone, or any other part of her body that gets about as much attention as the other Spears sister.
- For him: I know how it goes. As long as he gets what's on the other side of the equal sign in that equation, he's good to go. But men like the build-up more than they'll let on. A big turn-on: A great scalp massage, or the bookend approach of head and feet only. Not that he'll complain if things begin stirring somewhere in between.
Have your own ideas about how to spice up the relationship each and every day? Share them here.
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Want more from David? Check out "Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's Guide for Women" and "The Abs Diet" on Yahoo! Shopping.