By David Zinczenko Provided by: Men's Health

Dave Zinczenko's Mysteries of the Sexes Explained

Why Do Men Spend So Much Time at Their Jobs? By David Zinczenko - Posted Wed, Jan 03, 2007, 1:55 pm PST

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  • 1. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 03, 2007, 4:34 pm PST

    David, it sounds like you are describing corporate workers. In that case I'd have to agree -- I worked in corp. America for many years and your description fits. Are you familiar with the Meyers Briggs personality profile? I learned about it and found it fascinating and incredibly accurate. I always wondered why I never fit into corporate America. DUH! So I left. My point is, there are also many other types of men with differing personality profiles. For instance I live rurally now, and the farmers and ranchers are very family oriented. It's quite nice. Well, it's just a thought; I wanted to just share that with you. Thanks!

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  • 2. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 03, 2007, 5:48 pm PST

    Say did anyone else see David on the Today Show with Dr. Berman this morning? It was like blog day on Today.

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  • 3. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 03, 2007, 6:55 pm PST

    blond-really? Too bad I missed it!

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  • 4. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Wed, Jan 03, 2007, 7:00 pm PST

    Cant say I had this happen to me. I wished when married he would of worked over time!lol Now, I have a friend who is going through this. She believes he is cheating just cant prove it yet. Some guys can get away with this, with certain jobs. If its normal for him to get called out during the night, or has free reign. Guess there isn't stopping a guy who wants to cheat and has lots of freedom is his job. Of course, I just listen to her, I hope he's not, but my gut instincts says he is. I think hers does too, she just doesn't won't to believe it.

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  • 5. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 12:41 am PST

    Perhaps if relationships provided a similar level of reward to Men, we would invest more in them. Find a way to please a man. (nagging and complaining does not give men pleasure)

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  • 6. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 3:55 am PST

    lol! I can understand the nagging part. I have a good friend who has the best husband. He is nice looking, takes care of himself,very sweet, works hard and she does nothing but nag. She is nice to everyone but him. She stays home all day, he comes home, no supper and a dirty house. Then nags for him to do some odd end jobs. I finally in a joking way told her one time, nag, nag nag. She looked at me an I told her its true. Now I hate nagging I really do, and alot of women are soooooo good a t that. But men close up. They sit there and pretend your a fool and nothing is wrong. A woman can feel in her gut, even though she might not say anything, that her man is cheating. I felt it everytime, and eventually got my proof.

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  • 7. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 5:05 am PST

    As for Corporate America you've posed some good points, but I work in EMS. I would submit that for a lot of us its because at work we are actualized where as at home we tend not to be. Even those of us who have a good balance of family and work, not working 100 hours a pay period. But my question is why does it seem that men are always the villains? Society makes it seem like women are angels and men are demons. Its not humanly possible for men to be wrong 100% of the time. Just curious on that one?

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  • 8. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 11:04 am PST

    I think that men spend more time at work because that is where they are successful. It is all mind work. When they get home, it is all about emotions and issues of the heart and when they are not very good at dealing with emotional issues then they shy away from it.

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  • 9. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 11:31 am PST

    I think mens no different from cavemen hunting buffalo. Our jobs and performance is essential to the survival of the family and the tribe. From a man's perspective, there is no greater gesture of love than to selflessly and continually provide for his family. Women used to share similar but contrasting cave duties like keeping the hearth and home but technology like washing machines, stoves and supermarkets eliminated all of their daily labor. As a result, after millions of years of evolution, men are still hunting daily, while women, newly liberated from their chores and contributions, are feeling incomplete and unhappy, in other words, they don't know what to do with their new freedom. I have no solution to this dilemma, only an understanding of why marriages don't last like they used to. It's future shock, where we have all of this great technology, but cannot understand or control the social consequences of it.

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  • 10. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 11:33 am PST

    I think mens no different from cavemen hunting buffalo. Our jobs and performance is essential to the survival of the family and the tribe. From a man's perspective, there is no greater gesture of love than to selflessly and continually provide for his family. Women used to share similar but contrasting cave duties like keeping the hearth and home but technology like washing machines, stoves and supermarkets eliminated all of their daily labor. As a result, after millions of years of evolution, men are still hunting daily, while women, newly liberated from their chores and contributions, are feeling incomplete and unhappy, in other words, they don't know what to do with their new freedom. I have no solution to this dilemma, only an understanding of why marriages don't last like they used to. It's future shock, where we have all of this great technology, but cannot understand or control the social consequences of it.

    Report Abuse
  • 11. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 11:34 am PST

    I think mens no different from cavemen hunting buffalo. Our jobs and performance is essential to the survival of the family and the tribe. From a man's perspective, there is no greater gesture of love than to selflessly and continually provide for his family. Women used to share similar but contrasting cave duties like keeping the hearth and home but technology like washing machines, stoves and supermarkets eliminated all of their daily labor. As a result, after millions of years of evolution, men are still hunting daily, while women, newly liberated from their chores and contributions, are feeling incomplete and unhappy, in other words, they don't know what to do with their new freedom. I have no solution to this dilemma, only an understanding of why marriages don't last like they used to. It's future shock, where we have all of this great technology, but cannot understand or control the social consequences of it.

    Report Abuse
  • 12. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 1:34 pm PST

    Hearing the "success-objects" term is an eye-opener for me. Right after college graduation, my boyfriend landed a solid entry-level job at a respected corp. But because he was entry-level, he was extremly unhappy and craved a job with more to the title. I was in the same situation, and craved more as well, but my perspective was completely different. Women are rarely judged based on her job, but men are judged by that constantly and by everyone. Thanks for the insight.

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  • 13. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 3:36 pm PST

    I love the term "success-object". I know lots of women who reject a man based on what he does for a living, without bothering to get to know him. I think that there is a lot of pressure for men to succeed, and I agree that younger men or men newer to a company will spend extra time to get some sure footing on the corporate ladder. However, if a man has been working for a few years, and is married or in a relationship, than perhaps the woman or partner better look at some reasons why he'd rather be at work. Is she creating a stressful environment? Men need some downtime after a hard day at work. I knew a man who who stay late at work reading books because his wife was always entertaining guests or off to some social function, and he didn't feel like he could kick back and relax in his own home. Sometimes just handing the guy a beer and giving him some down time is the key to keeping him at home more. But you've made some excellent points, David.

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  • 14. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 7:46 pm PST

    7: the feminist movement makes women seem like angels and men like demons. all in the name of equality, you have to tear one group down to bring the other group up and make them "feel good" about themselves. it's the politically correct way.

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  • 15. Posted by A Yahoo! Health User on Thu, Jan 04, 2007, 7:47 pm PST

    7: the feminist movement makes women seem like angels and men like demons. all in the name of equality, you have to tear one group down to bring the other group up and make them "feel good" about themselves. it's the politically correct way.

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