In an age of Botox parties and wrinkle creams, "aging gracefully" keeps getting pushed aside to make way for the latest physical fix. But Laura has realized it has more to do with attitude than upkeep.
Laura's Story
"Age is the last big culturally acceptable bias that we have."
I was never sensitive about age. I never thought about it at all, and it never occurred to me that anyone else did until I looked around to see what opportunities there were for me to perform. The first season of American Idol came on, and I thought, you can be any race, sexual orientation, weight, religion, anything, and you can compete on American Idol, but you can't be over 24 years old. I was beginning to do a solo show, and I thought people were going to think that I was nuts trying to perform as a musician for the first time in my life at my age, whatever that age may be. I thought, I will defuse the objection and I will make my show about age.
"I called my show 'My Ship Has Sailed, or How to Be a Late Bloomer in a World Obsessed with Extreme Youth.'"
I talk about the different appearance standards for men and women. We women are such perfectionists about ourselves, but we are not so much with the men that we love. We accept all these physical imperfections in our men while we are trying to look absolutely perfect. I have a song about it that is a parody of the song "My Man." I have a song about Botox, too. Madonna does a song called "Frozen," and I re-wrote that to be about Botox, and I usually dedicate it to the cast of Desperate Housewives, particularly Marcia Cross.
I end the show with a totally different discussion of age, because there has been a backlash on all the emphasis of youth. Some people are really getting sick of it, so Oprah does her age-defying magazine issues, you go into bookstore and you see rack after rack of books on how to age, how to get through mid-life, menopause and all these things. But they are just as age-obsessed as the other side; they are just trying to put a positive spin on it.
"We think of diversity in terms of race, but I think of it in terms of age, too."
I have always been a little different about age than most people. When I first got out of college and was looking for an apartment, I wanted to live in a place that had older people, younger people, and just a wide variety of ages. Eventually I found an apartment building that had all off these different people -- one really old crazy woman, younger people with children -- and that was the thing that I was looking for. My best friend is about 60, and we can talk about anything from any perspective. If I had met her when she was 20 or 30, I would've still loved her. The same is true with my 20-year-old friends.
"Life doesn't happen on a time table. It is your experiences that shape you."
The stereotype is that older people are wise, but there are some younger people who have been through losing their parents and all kinds of things that people in their 50s and 60s haven't experienced yet. By surrounding yourself with people of all ages and experiences, that's when you understand everyone has something to teach you.
"The way I look at it, age is like your shoe size. It really doesn't tell anybody anything about you."
I take a pretty flexible attitude about age, and I know that I am going to change as I get older. I have these little lines around my eyes and I could go out and get Botox and fix them, but I kind of like them. I think they look like my mother's little lines, so I am not going to do anything about them. I look at some older women, and I think they are beautiful. They are so dynamic in so many ways, and I would be proud to be an older woman who gave off that kind of strength.
